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Showing posts from 2018

Remember

This time of year naturally lends itself to reflecting on holidays past, so I decided to read back through some of my holiday posts I have written over the years. I wrote some of these from a place of exhaustion and looking back I can see the pain clearly woven in every word; others I wrote out of a desperation to see life from the perspective of having lived through it. A few I wrote from a place of deep satisfaction and happiness. Life is often a balance of holding pain and joy at the same time. We don't have to choose one or the other, we can choose to accept life has both. It is where we put our focus that can make all the difference. The holidays aren't a time for rushing or preparing or forcing our way through. This season is meant to be a time to reflect, a time to love, a time to believe. This season holds so much hope and light if only we lean in close to find it. Love a Little More Holiday Hush   Holiday Juggling  Christmas Exhaustion Unexpected Inte

Changes

I was cleaning today, which gave me time to think, and thinking always leads me here. The house is 'weekend messy', so decided to clean my floors, because The Nester says if your floors are clean the rest of the house feels clean too, even if it isn’t.  I have found that it is pretty good advice, so when everything else feels chaotic, I clean the floors. Of course for me, cleaning the floors also means picking up the toys, shoes, clothes, etc. so that I can even begin to vacuum, which naturally leads to a cleaner home as well.  While cleaning up I began to think about how this blog has evolved over the years, from a desire to write like The Nester about home, into what it is now.  I started writing this blog when I was dreaming of building a new home. Then plans changed, life took turns, and we ended up in a home so different than I expected and so perfect for our family. Somewhere along the way I realized that home wasn’t in the walls that went up or in the co

Feed the People

Want to know the one thing we all have in common? Single, married, kids, no kids, male, female, whatever… We all need to eat. One of the questions I get asked most from you guys is, what is the best way is to get meals on the table for dinner? Here is what I know. What works for one persons schedule and personality may not work for the next. So rather than give you a tutorial on what works for me, I am going to give you all the tips and ideas I have for making meal time a little easier. These are some of my favorite links, blogs, recipes, meals planning subscriptions, cookbooks, all of it. You pick what works for you. Try it out, if it doesn't work for you, try something different. Take a little of this and a little of that and mix it together till it feels right for you. The goal is to make life more simple, not add one more thing to your plate (ha, sorry). In the end, what you feed yourself and the people you love is not what matters. What matters is that they leave the t

Summer Lessons

Making our house feel like home in the summer feels more chaotic to me than the slower months. November through March, when its dark early and bedtimes come swiftly, meals are slow cooked all day long, and warm light comes from houses in the evening hours, just naturally lends itself to an aesthetic of quiet and calm. At least for me. Summer lends itself to late nights out, days where we are only home long enough to drop piles by the door, eat and leave a mess on the table, dirty more clothes than a small country in a matter of days, and the chaos of home just seems unsettled and rushed. I am going in circles most days, feeling like I am not accomplishing anything and yet spinning and spinning and trying to not tip over.  And yet... And yet, a couple times a month someone asks me “How do you do it all?”  I feel like I am that analogy of a duck on the pond, I look calm on the surface, but underneath my feet are kicking like crazy. And really that is just on a good

Miserable Mother's Day

Alright ladies, Mothers Day is over! Another day of fallen expectations and sorrow and hurt, that is covered up with smiles and cards and flowers, it done. Now we can breathe again. Yes, it’s a day meant to celebrate how beautiful, hard working, and selfless mothers are, but how many of us have spent this day hiding in a room and crying? Last night I crawled into bed and I said to my husband, “Thank you for a decent Mother’s Day.” I know that doesn’t exactly sound like a compliment, but given that more than once this holiday has ended in a screaming fight, where I feel under appreciated for all my efforts, I’d say a decent Mother’s Day is satisfactory.  The truth is, Mother’s Day is hard for a lot of us. Whether it’s because you have lost a mother, desperately want to be a mother and aren’t, resent motherhood, feel unappreciated, feel like a failure, or your experiences are nothing like you expected. Whatever you reason, it is valid.  A day meant to celebrate women for

Why The Cross?

If Easter has never made sense to you, if you have ever wondered why a God of love, is celebrated by a brutal death, if you have wondered why Jesus had to die and why God couldn't just shake the sky and shout out with thunder and angels and save us all, then you are not alone.  I have asked the same questions a thousand times. I have sat through sermons on it and listened to it discussed in depth at bible studies. I have read books upon books trying to understand why Jesus had to die and why God couldn't have just told us how much he loved us and told us we are saved.  If He is a God of mercy, God of love, God of power, then why did it have to be Jesus' death on the cross? It never made any sense.  Why did Jesus have to die? Why couldn't God just shake the sky and shout out his love. Why couldn't it be fireworks and thunder and mind blowing shows of power and might? It all comes down to love. Understanding Gods love has helped me to comprehend w

Small Victories

My baby boy turns two in July. He is my last baby. I am tasting freedom, the likes of which I haven't had in years! I am savoring all the lasts and acknowledging milestones for what they are… but lets be honest, most days I am fist pumping, high kicking and dancing in celebration. This is not a blog post about how sweet these days are or how I need to appreciate it while they are little. That is important, but that is for another day. Today I am celebrating how much I can get done in a day now that my baby can feed himself and go out with his Daddy to do chores. We are in the process of finishing out our basement and creating a family room. The kids are spending a lot more time down there, so we no longer have the need for a large toy room. On the flip side, I am spending more time writing and keeping up with our ever growing farm paper work and I need a space that I can spread out in and keep kids out of. Yesterday I swapped my large toy room and my small office ro

Fear of Failure

I have always been the kind of woman who whispers dreams, but never one to name them and chase them down.  In high school I wanted to be an actress. In college I wanted to write an epic novel. I never pursued either of those things because I thought they were too impractical, too artistic, for someone like me.  The thing about dreams is they rarely go away completely.  I still want to write a book. I still love being on a stage. My dreams don't look the same as they did back then, but traces of them are woven into my life. I have been paid to write and I have been paid to speak my words, and yet still I hesitate to call myself a writer or a speaker.  I live with the fear of failure. Not just a little fear, but rather a huge, crippling fear of failing.  If I have not laid out a plan A and B and C and two more contingency plans that have backup plans with a safety net, then it is a solid bet, I will not try something new.  Truthfully, it is not the fai

Comfort

I do not have an organized, clean home, although I crave one. I haven't found a magic bullet to 'keeping house', although I think it is somewhere in having no children, no husband, a live in maid, and perhaps being British royalty. For those of us that fall outside that sweet spot, I think we will forever be playing a vicious game of cat and mouse with house chores. We all have different strengths and pitfalls in home making. I am not here to judge or even offer advice, but I will share what is inspiring me. Laundry is my nemesis. I am trying to come up with a better system that doesn't leave me wanting to burn the whole house down rather than have to deal with the laundry. I mashed up a bunch of your advice that I asked for on Facebook and it is helping.  The main thing though, was a perspective change. I'm going to be totally honest, the main reason I wan't getting laundry done was because I just didn't think it was worthy of my time. I have a

Scars

You are not broken. You are scarred. Scars tell your story. A battle. A fight. You are not a failure. You stand back up. You are fierce. You are beautiful. You are sacred. You are a fighter. You are strong. You are needed. You matter.  Humanity matters.  That voice inside of you, Let it out.  Shout it out.  Stand tall.  Wear your scars. Own your mistakes.  Dance to the rhythm of your pain, your courage, your relentless spirit.  Find your purpose.  Find your peace.  Find you.  You are not alone.  You illuminate.  You radiate.  You are unique.  You are undefined.  Every breath you take is a story of resolve.  A story of redemption.  A story of grace.  A story of perseverance. It is your story.  Own it. 

2018 Inspiration

Let this be the year we lift each other up, support each others dreams, and inspire one another. Here are a few books I am reading (or hope to read soon) and podcasts I'm listening to. Happy Friday friends! "She made broken look beautiful and strong look invincible. She walked with the universe on her shoulders and made it look like a pair of wings." -Ariana Dancu Books on…  *Home A Simplified Life A Book That Takes Its Time Chasing Slow Present Over Perfect Love Lives Here The Lifegiving Home *Motherhood Why Motherhood Matters Mom Set Free She's Still There *Life Unseen A Fierce Love If You Only Knew *Food The Lifegiving Table The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Dinnertime Forest Feast Gatherings Podcasts The Happy Hour The Encourager Mom Struggling Well For The Love Glorious in the Mundane The Shauna Niequist Podcast Source