Simple Home and Happiness

Gratitude is the key to a life of contentment and joy and yet it still eludes me. I can wake up and whisper gratitude to my heart. I can stir my morning cup to its tune. I can give thanks for my health, my family, my home and then I watch it slip through my fingers as life gets in the way. Running late for school, flat tires, crabby kids, burnt supper, piles of laundry, dirty dishes, arguments with my husband. Pretty soon, my song of thanks, is a repeat in my head of all the wrongs, all that is unfair. Even though I know that if I remain thankful, I can change my own attitude, it is sometimes so much easier to slip into resentment. Gratitude takes practice, discipline. Resentment is easy. How easy it is for me to feel unappreciated when I am folding my seventh pile of laundry, how simple it is to resent the dirty floors I just swept five minutes ago, how enticing to grumble about cleaning up the toys for the hundredth time. But how hard it is for me to be thankful for t...

You can be strong and cry.  You can feel blessed and feel sad.  You can love your children and wish they were back in school.  You can love staying at home and wish you worked outside the house.  You can love your job and wish you could stay at home.  You can be surrounded by people and feel lonely.  You can crave quiet and be grateful for the noise.  You can be a good Mom and miss the old you. You can work hard and feel unproductive.  You can love your life and want a break. You can be content and set goals. You can be brave and be scared. You can be happy and hurt.  You can be busy and rest. You can be faithful and have doubts. You can be satisfied and dream. You do not have to choose.  Be both.  Be you.  ... Source #choosingand

I know some really beautiful women. The kind of women that turn heads when they walk into a room. They have a glow about them, a quality about them that radiates and draws people to them. And you want to know the most ridiculous thing about these women? They all put themselves down. A new mother that hasn't lost the baby weight.  A grandmother dissapointed in the under-flab on her arms. A  perfectly fit woman who doesn't feel thin enough. Her butt is too big. Her thighs are too thick. She doesn't wear shorts because her legs are too white. The list is endless. Why do we take our functioning bodies and put them down? Isn't it enough that our bodies carry us through the day. It gets us out of bed in the mornings, it cuddles, it carries laundry baskets, it gets us to work, it cooks supper, it lays down exhausted far too late in the night. Our bodies carry us through joy and grief, it takes us down wedding isles and across graduation stages. Our bodies bare scars that...

We live in a hurting world. There is so much hate, and violence in the world. It seems to be escalating and intensifying. It can be easy to feel like it is out of control and beyond help. We shake our heads. We grumble about what the world is coming to. We let fear creep in.  We give up, because it all seems too far gone. And yet, I keep coming back to same thing in my head, over and over; we have the power to stop the violence, the hate, the abuse. Every single one of us, has the power. We have turned a blind eye. We ignored all the warning signs, we were busy with our own problems, and didn't take the time to see what was right in front of us. Every offender was once a child , more than likely a hurting child.  What if you were the one to make all the difference? What if you smiled at that child, and told him it was ok he was late for school and offered him a granola bar before he joined his class. What if you saw her waiting for her bus every...

The words that I want to say about marriage have been tumbling around inside my head for a very long time, but I have never hit publish because of fear. Fear that you might think I am being judgemental. Fear that my words would hurt someone. Fear that you would see my vulnerability. Fear that I would be misunderstood. Before you read on, know this: In no way do I think that someone in an abusive relationship should have to stay. There are MANY reasons people choose to leave a relationship, and I respect those who are strong enough to do so. Not every marriage will last and I do not judge anyones choices! This is intended for those who are dealing with the 'everyday' hardships of marriage and need a little encouragement that they are not alone. With that said, I have struggled to put into words the right mix of joy, pain, heartache and faith that it has taken to get my husband and I to every anniversary. But what I have learned in my years of writing, is that every ...

I have been writing here for over five years. Writing in this space has motivated me and changed me. It's has shaped a part of who I am.  I just wanted to say thank you. If you've been reading for awhile or just found me recently, I truly appreciate all your comments, whether online or in person.  The past two months have been slow on writing, mostly due to the fact that typing with my broken wrist was pretty much a no-go. Then life got crazy and we had several doctors trips and even another emergency room visit, so things got pushed aside. But here we are at the end of March and heading straight into Spring. The days are getting longer, and as everyone else is celebrating it, I am mourning the end of early nights around the dinner table and babies being tucked into bed before eight o'clock. But life moves forward and I am learning to accept it, because each moment is temporary. Breaking my wrist and being forced to slow down has taught me so many lessons, ...

Things have been crazy over here. Since breaking my wrist, we have been struck down with baby illnesses, stitches, respiratory issues, and minor surgery. Top it off with day to day living of six people under one roof, in late winter, in South Dakota, and I am telling you, we barely made it, but by grace, wine, and prayer, we survived. We have so much drama with four out of six of us being female. And if you think a two year old doesn't have drama, then you have never lived with a two year old girl. Seriously people, all the emotions, ALL the time. I am a big feeler of emotions. This can be a blessing and a curse. All my girls are this way as well. These days, there are so many FEELINGS. Yes, I am shouting, because oh my word. I cannot even handle it all. And I get it, I am an emotional person. And I keep preaching it to my husband, that we have to teach the girls to deal with their feelings and give them tools to cope. But man, after two months of upheaval, and schedules ...

Well it has been a week since I wrote this.  Things didn't magically fix themselves, but I did get two consecutive great nights of sleep before the baby revolted and remembered he only likes to sleep in two hour increments. So here I am looking at Monday again. I started writing this post early this morning, and now the sun is setting and I am on the fourth sentence. My Monday didn't exactly go according to plan. But it did involve an unexpected, glorious two hour nap and a surprise care package in the mailbox from a sweet friend. Never under estimate the power of gifting a friend a nap or a pampering gift that says, "You are loved." Surround yourself with good people. The kind of people you look forward to seeing light up your phone and your life. I am in that awkward phase of having small children and the opportunity to get together with friends is REALLY far and few between. But they are there, quietly going on with their own crazy lives, waiting fo...

I am in a moody place right now. I am in the middle of tax preparation (makes me want to scream), kids are in post-Christmas detox, baby boy still has yet to sleep through the night, and my husband is trying to help, but I mostly want to punch him in the face. My struggles are small in comparison to many but sometimes even the little struggles can feel monumental. I have cried simply because I am tired, because my back hurts from falling on the ice, because I have not gotten my way, because everyone needs something from me ALL THE TIME. I will get out of this funk. I will find the happy, and I will fight for it. Normally when I sit down to write, I try to think about what someone may need to hear to lift them up and I usually end up giving myself a pep talk in the process. But today there is no pep talk. Today there is just brutal honesty. Today I am tired, I am sad, I am frustrated. In this space, where I try encourage others, I want to let you know, that even the most ...

As I ran out the door to take a hot lunch to my seven year olds classroom today, I found myself thinking, "A better Mom would have brought a vegetable." Despite having baked four stromboli loaves from scratch, despite having been up since 4:30 a.m., despite having kept four children alive for another day, I somehow thought (however briefly) in that moment, that I wasn't good enough. Of course half way to town I shook myself out of it. I reminded myself that it wouldn't have mattered if I brought the perfect vegetable pairing or take-out pizza or casserole from a box. The only thing that mattered was that I was going to show up. I was going to bring a meal to a great group of kids, who could not care less what they were being fed. They were just happy to get food; kids are easy like that. I am sharing two posts that I wrote awhile back, because I needed the pep talk today. And maybe I am not alone, maybe you need it too. No matter who you are, no matter your ...

Mary must have been exhausted. She was carrying a miracle, yes, but she was also carrying an out of wedlock baby, on a long journey, to give birth in rudimentary settings, with no family around, and no idea what would happen next. Christmas Eve found me sleep deprived, anxious, and preparing for an evening ahead that would require more energy and happiness than I could muster. So I sat in a church pew on Christmas Eve and cried for Mary and how tired she must have been, for how unfair it was that she would never fully comprehend the awesome power that her sacrifice would bring to the world. I cried because that one little baby would make every single one of my mistakes ok. Maybe you are in the middle of your own exhaustion. Maybe you are carrying something wonderful and powerful, but right now it just feels like a burden. Stay strong, your burden may become a light for others. If you are still happily enjoying the extra time with kids, and the extended bed times, and the fami...

I have never been able to figure out if I am an extrovert or an introvert. If you know me personally, you probably think right away, "She's an extrovert!". But as much as I love people, and gatherings; I love, love, love being at home. I love being here with my people, watching movies, playing board games, just existing, together at home. It's my favorite.  So when I have running around to do, it can get stressful for me. I can quickly feel overwhelmed, constantly picking up one kid, dropping off another, going to town and back again several times a day. And when things are scheduled on a Sunday, my tolerance level peaks out. I like my Sundays to rest, reset, and breathe.  This month I do not have a single Sunday that will be spent at home.  I am dreading it already. I want to curl up and cry. I want to stomp my feet and say, "No, No, No". I want to put on my pajamas and Christmas music, lock the door and pout.  But since that does not ap...

The baby didn't sleep last night. As in, he was awake every, single, hour, and intermittently, his sister woke me up as well. I should be sleeping right now, truly, but he just laid down for his nap and there are words I want to say. So I give them to you. I have a friend who is hurting right now. She has received hard news, and her heart is broken and my heart breaks for her. I would fix it all if I could; wouldn't we all, given the chance? But of course I can't. I can pray like crazy, I can listen and I can be supportive. I can also cook and I can bring drinks, because sometimes, you just need good food and a good drink. There is a lot of negative in the world right now. I could blame it on the recent election, but I think it has more to do with our mindsets. It's easy to latch onto the doomsday mentality. It's easy to get sucked into our own head space and worry and turmoil. The holidays for me are a beautiful, magical, wonderful time of year. I know that...

I don't know what it is exactly that is causing this extreme meltdown in my friends at this particular moment in time, but it seems that everywhere I turn another one of us is struggling to pull it together and about half of us have flat out given up the ruse that we are keeping it together. I would venture to guess that a lot of it, is just getting back into the swing of getting kids to school, and sport practice and music lessons, and where I live, harvest season. I know that because I am a mom to four littles, I am also surrounded by other moms of the same age group, but I am willing to bet if you have older kids, you have your own struggles, or have definitely been in our place. If you do not have kids. Quit reading now, I wouldn't want to discourage you from having children. I swear despite all our complaining, it really is the most wonderful thing to have children. Except when it isn't. Full disclosure I am in full on potty training mode with a toddler, the ba...

I am an avid reader. I love many different genres and tons of different authors. Knowing this about me, a girlfriend texted me the other day and said she wanted to get a devotional book, what would I recommend? I had to tell her something, something I had felt for a long time, but I don't think I had ever given words to before. I do not like devotionals. I feel guilty about this, and a little like I am not as good of a person as the people who set aside time during their day and commit to a true 'devotional'. I cannot get into them and I have never found one I can stick too. My problem is simple, they are too much work. Most devotionals I have ever read want me to read what they have to say and then get out my bible and look up certain verses. Some even have the gall to prompt me to sit down and write out my thoughts. Whoa, hold up, how much time do you think I have? Now, lets be clear, Jesus deserves my time. I get that. But right now, Jesus and I have an agree...

My list of 'to-do's' is a mile long and I can think of a hundred reasons I should not be sitting here writing, but I don't care. The long stretch of pregnancy is finally over. Baby boy joined the girl tribe nearly three weeks ago, and it has been such a blessing. My pregnancy was not an enjoyable one at all, so when he arrived nine days before my due date, I was a bit surprised, but purely delighted. My three previous kiddos came within two days of their due date, but I kept telling my husband I didn't think I would make it to my due date with baby number four. Even with that intuition, I wasn't as prepared as I should have been. When we got home from the hospital I had lots of newborn clothes to wash and I had to dig the bassinet out of the basement and clean it up. Here's the great thing about having multiple children; you no longer sweat the small stuff. Have you ever seen that mom with a ton of kids and you wonder how she does it, and how she rem...

Today I was amazing. I got the oldest to school on time, ran errands with the little ones, came home and scrubbed the whole house in time for a very important meeting with the banker, I folded (and PUT AWAY laundry) and as I type this, homemade supper is simmering on the stove. Seriously, today I nailed it. Yesterday was the exact opposite. A dear friend is struggling with life right now. She feels like she is sinking and that she is failing in every area of life; motherhood, marriage, and work. Everywhere I look I see another post or article on how we need to rid ourselves of Mom guilt, and then another one on how to balance work and home life, and another on the need to let it all go. I have even written my own versions of such things. Here is the truth. I am so over it. I am over hearing how we need to do this and that to have balance and rid ourselves of the guilt. There is no such thing as doing it all. Somedays you kick butt, somedays you suck at life. That's the ...

My house is a mess. Not just run of the mill, I have kids messy, but real deal, it would take some serious hours of deep cleaning to tackle this mess, mess. With little energy and time being at a premium, I tackled the most visible thing that I can handle right now that is driving me crazy. The girls do most of their crafting, sewing, homework, you name it, at our dining room table. I am constantly nagging at them to put away their project for meal time and yet inevitably I end up scooping it all up and dropping it on the fireplace mantle next to the table. This has led to a fireplace that was overflowing with piles of discarded projects. I began looking for a free standing piece of furniture to put in the dining room, something multifunctional to hold all of our puzzles, crayons, papers, crafts, board games, etc. I thought perhaps a buffet with lots of storage or a hutch would do the trick. Right away I found the perfect piece, but at $425 I wasn't prepared to invest that ki...

Mondays are my work day. Working from home means having to be a self starter, which I tend not to be. If something has a deadline, you can bet I will have it done, and done well, on time. But until its necessary for me to actually begin a task, I put it off. Case in point, today, none of the bills due are actually due today or tomorrow. So I am sitting at my desk writing rather than getting down to business. When we got married, my husband and I discussed what our roles in our family business were going to be. It took a lot of learning and give and take, but we agreed that I would handle the bulk of the office work and he would handle the bulk of the outdoor chores. It isn't perfect and we both pitch in  to help the other out when its needed, but for us, this is the system that works best. Working from home requires a specific kind of balance. A balance that has taken me a very long time to figure out. I use to think that since I worked from home, I just did my office work wh...

Inevitably when you are a talker and open like I am, people will ask you questions. When I am pregnant, the questions often center there. The other night, while out with several friends, I was asked the same question over and over. How did you know you wanted another baby or how do you know when you are done having babies? Obviously I cannot answer for everyone, but I can tell you what my experience has been. With each of our pregnancies, I would wonder, "Is this my last pregnancy?" Then I would be cuddling those sweet little newborns, with their soft skin and fresh smell and I would wonder "Is this the last time I will have a newborn of my own?" People had told me over the years, "Trust me you will know when you are done having babies." But it was such vague answer, it was something they couldn't describe, just a knowing sense. That was frustrating. This is my fourth pregnancy, we have three wonderful little girls. In discussing whether ...